To trust God in the light is nothing, but trust Him in the dark that is faith. C.H. Spurgeon
When you feel good, your relationship is going well with your husband and kids, the grandkids are cute and adorable, it’s easy to have faith in God. You wake up, have breakfast, and then go do your workout, it’s a great start to the day. Then you begin with the chores and meal planning. You can have days, weeks, even months go by and everything goes smoothly. God is Good, and your faith is strong.
Then life hits you smack in the face.
One of those moments for me was in the late 1970’s. I had been having a lot of abdomen pain and irregular periods. This had gone on for a couple of years. I had seen the doctor about it, and we were also trying to have a second child, that wasn’t working either. My doctor told me he would have to do exploratory surgery to see if he could help relieve the pain and help me to be able to get pregnant.
At first I was okay with this. Then fear started to encroach on my thoughts and feelings. I was becoming more and more nervous as the surgery date got closer. I talked with my husband, family and friends, but no one was able to ease my frazzled nerves.
Then one day I saw that our pastor was at the backyard neighbors home. I called her and asked her to see if he could come over and talk with me when he was done visiting with her. A while later he was at my front door. I welcomed him in, we sat in the living room and began to talk. I told him about my upcoming surgery and that I was afraid.
He asked me what was making me so nervous. I told him that I was afraid that the doctor would find cancer. My mother had died from cancer only three years earlier when I was pregnant with our first daughter. I was afraid of dying and not be able to raise our beautiful daughter, April.
His response was that that was silly. Just because my mom had cancer, didn’t mean that I would also have it. He took down my surgery date and said he’d pray for me. I still didn’t feel at ease with my upcoming surgery and struggled regularly with my nerves.
The day before I was to go to the hospital I called the church to ask if the pastor could come to the hospital. I was told that he was away on vacation and wouldn’t be able to come. That night unable to concentrate on TV I went up to take a hot bath. That didn’t help either. They laying on my bed I opened my heart to God and cried in agony. Please help me, I can’t do this alone. Instantly I felt a literal heavy weight being lifted off of me. I felt the peace that passes all understanding. I knew that God was with me and would help me through whatever was ahead.
The next morning, I went to the hospital and was happy and joking around with all of the staff. They told me I would have a Band-Aid if all was well. If there was a problem I would have a lot of gauze and tape on my stomach. Then they gave me a shot and I immediately went to sleep. It seemed like only moments later that I was trying to wake up. Everything was fuzzy. I remember asking several times how big my bandage was. Finally, I was awake enough to know that I just had a Band-Aid.
Praise God. I found out that I didn’t have cancer, but endometriosis. It’s scar tissue near and around the ovaries. This was what was causing my pain and inability to become pregnant. I was very relieved with this news. My prayer was then to thank God for being able to have one child. I was able to relax and enjoy the life we had. Then God surprised us with our daughter, Nickie, when April was seven years old.
When I was struggling the most, I forgot to pray and ask God what I should do. My faith was weak; I was trying to do it on my own. When I finally laid down on my bed and cried out to Him, He lifted my anxiety and fear, and gave me His peace. We all need to remember that no matter what our situation He is there to help and guide us.
Here is a website with quotes that can help you in your daily walk: www.dailyinspirationalquotes.in
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