Asparagus Farmer Ruins Potluck Supper

By Henry Brown

A Wednesday night supper at Pleasant Grove Baptist Church turned into a 911 call and several people treated for heart palpitations. The church hadn’t seen this much excitement since the revival of 1992.

An unusual odor had made its way through the fellowship hall. Most of the people didn’t realize that a vegetable could have caused all this commotion.

“Sister Bertha smelled it first.” Mildred Same said as she sat fanning herself and holding her heart. “We didn’t know what it was. We thought some of our bus kids brought in a bottle of sulphur and poured it in the bathroom commodes. But it turned out it was the odd farmer.”

Ted Kelly was new to Wednesday night suppers and new to the small community. He owns twenty-five acres and has several greenhouses. He didn’t understand what happened but two of the deacons finally asked him to leave.

“I thought they know what asparagus was and what it did. But I was definitely wrong.” Ted said.

“Wednesday night suppers are the same things the same way. Our systems are sensitive. We are used to eating the same meals and that’s the way we like it.” Mildred said.

The restrooms are right next to the kitchen and the odor began to burn the eyes of longtime members, Bertha Strict and Mildred Same. When they couldn’t understand what was happening they called 911 and eventually poison control.

“When the rescue unit came, they informed us it was the vegetable Mr. Kelly brought” Mildred said. We then asked him to leave. You can’t risk the children and youth eating new food.”

One thing is for sure the children really liked the new vegetable. They said they learned a lot about food that night.

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Rodney is an author, pastor, and the founder/managing editor of He has written over 200 articles and his first novel, The Rise of the Prophet, has just been released.

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